Photo credit: My writerly friend who took this picture on Sunday! Thanks friend! And thanks to my other friend (all interconnected!) who said “yes” when I asked him to do this silly presentation with me. 🙂

Last week, I had the great pleasure of going to my very first in-person The Muse and the Marketplace Conference, a yearly gathering put on by GrubStreet. I did the two online pandemic conferences, which I enjoyed, but I really do have to say that the in-person version is the best version of the conference.

Going to Boston always bubbles up big feelings for me. Massachusetts isn’t my favorite place. I’ll spend the rest of my life processing my time there, and that includes reconciling the goodness I experienced along with the bad. Because of the Guild and now because of GrubStreet, I travel up there a solid 4 times a year, at least. The last few times I’ve been, I’ve spent time in MetroWest with friends and there was the lingering feeling of unfinished business. This time, I was very selfish about staying in Boston proper, concentrating on my writing, and being very present for the conference. What I found was a really interesting feeling: nostalgia. It was hella unexpected. Something else happened, too, and the realization struck like lightning this morning as I continue to process.

Now that I’ve set this up, let me jump the timeline a little bit. I had two favorite sessions at Muse: How to Write Sex Scenes that Sizzle by Megan Hennessey (SO interesting and helpful!) and How to Stop Worrying and Embrace Genre Tropes by Mark Cecil. The tropes session was particularly interesting because I recognize tropes, but rarely think about them in my own writing until someone points them out. Tropes aren’t a bad thing. They are there for are there for a reason. It’s just that some of them rub of the wrong way.

For example, I personally hate the “it’s the journey that counts” trope. A riff on that (which doesn’t seem to be on TV Tropes, which is weird) is the “It’s really about the friends we make along the way” trope. These two tropes drive me a little bit crazy, maybe because a lot of the stories I consume end up going in that direction.

And now that I have written all of that, I can now reveal my post-conference epiphany:

Holy shit I’ve been living in my own least-favorite trope and how the hell did that happen?

Things I did in Boston:

• Met a dear friend’s new precious baby
• Did a cool session with a friend I met through a friend
• Found out that a fellow writer/leader I admire is friends with said friend
• Found out that my writing friend from my home state (who is also a friend of a friend) is friends with both of those friends
• Hugged an author who I hosted a virtual book launch
• Met and hugged a bunch of people who I have only known through email or Zoom
• Made a new friend who lives far away but is amazing and I can’t wait to see again
• Met and had drinks and laughs with a cohort-mate (we had the BEST time!)
• etc etc etc

I can pinpoint the exact places in my writerly-life timeline where the folk who I saw during my Muse trip sit. Folk who have been with me since my first day at Grub, folk who have supported me along the way, folk who I’ve brought into the Grub life and writing community, and folk who I admire and want to be when I “grow up” as a writer. In the end, my last thing before collapsing in bed and going home, was spending a whole afternoon with a gaggle of writers who I really admire, who I feel connected with, and who have made me a better writer and writerly citizen by knowing them. We all walked away afterward and made a group chat and I kept thinking, “oh shit. Do I have a writing posse? How did this happen?”

It happened because I’ve made friends along the way. More than I thought… more than I gave myself credit for.

And honestly, they’ve really mattered. Community matters for storytelling. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!

And this all comes back to say: embrace your tropes. Even when you think you don’t like them. They keep coming back for a reason–there is some truth in all of them. Here I have been living one all along and all I can do is sit back and sigh and say thank you.

P.S: Never been to The Muse and the Marketplace? Go. It’s worth it!

P.S.S.: Want to know some of my favorite tropes? Check out Rude from Final Fantasy VII. He’s my absolutely favorite walking, talking Badass in a Nice Suit.

Aside: I am really trying not to get sucked all the way into TVTropes, but if you’re looking for inspiration and thinking about what kind of tropes you respond to, this is certainly a great place to look. I am now making a personal commitment to write a story with a Bald Head of Toughness and a Badass in a Nice Suit. I kinda can’t wait. I hope you’ll find a favorite trope to write to in the months ahead, too!